Many teen movies cast the hero, or heroine, as striving to be a part of the “in crowd.” While the extreme antics to be in the popular crowd are primarily fictitious, there is an element of truth based on the prevalence of bullying or gossiping. The desire to be accepted comes at a cost to many. Acceptance in a sinful culture may feel good, but at what cost? Do we treat others as less than if they are not in the crowd with a high status? Who has not felt the sting of rejection in their lifetime? Rejection is painful, and has the potential to haunt us if we let it by valuing this culture’s views. God tells us about His acceptance and how we should accept others in Colossians 3:12-14 – “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Verse 12 explains how we are His greatly loved and chosen children, eternally. The status of popularity is temporary. Don’t seek status, but be respectful and kind to others pointing out how valuable they are, too. It’s not kind when we treat people as less than. The way we treat others can be explained using the metaphor of money,..do we treat people as if they are pennies, or quarters, or dollars? How do we rank people around us? We are judging people based on perceived status, or what someone can do for us. Judgement has the potential to create division instead of unity as desired and described in verse 14. Choose love in every situation for unity. Choose God. Meditate on His words, on His glory, and He will see you through.
The world deceives us that popularity is the most important thing to meditate on. It’s not. Research backs up the short-term status of popularity. In fact, the one with the highest status and who may be dubbed or described as the most popular is not typically well-liked. The “high status students are typically disliked by many of their peers” (Dr. Prinstein, 2020). “Because unlike the positive outcomes associated with high likability, research findings indicate that having high status leads to later aggression, addiction, hatred and despair.”
The advice, then, from research on popularity is to make sure you are likable by being kind and honest. Have a couple of good friends who are also likable and trustworthy, and take breaks from social media. “The struggles you are experiencing will turn out good for you in the long run.” From a spiritual perspective, God will see you through. Now, a prayer for you from Ephesians 3: 16-21 —–
“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”
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